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    Mormons Provide Solution to Area’s Chronic Drunk-Driving ProblemThe Nevada County Sheriff’s Department announced a new pilot program yesterday enlisting members of a local Mormon mission to give free rides to late night bar-goers. The partnership seeks to put an end to decades of tragic fatal alcohol-related incidents along Nevada County roadways, particularly along the Highway 49 corridor.

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    Nate the DummyVentriloquist dummies have come a long way from the days of Mortimer Snerd. They now appear life-like and may hold elected office. Puppetization of local elected officials was made possible with the advance of smart meter technology.

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    chemtrail toenailsArea community and chemtrail activist Saihra Ramun announced to a crowd out in front of Nevada City's New York Hotel that she plans on going door-to-door collecting toenail clippings to test for traces of chemtrails.

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    Adult TreatsThe board voted 5 to 2 in favor of allowing adult county residents to hand out revelry packages to other adults on All Hallows Eve, who thought county residents might enjoy a little light-hearted fun, make some new friends, and start their weekend off with a bang.

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    Artist's rendition of the proposed Sierra Buttes project. Yeah, you get what you pay for. No lip.In what may prove a bonanza for local tourism and a boost for racial harmony, President Obama has just signed an executive memorandum calling for the creation of a Mount Rushmore-like creation on the Sierra Buttes celebrating great African Americans.

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    Bend OverThe County paid $100,000 to outside attorneys and lost. Three times.  And now, the Nevada County Superior Court has added another $82,680 to the cost of allowing the Sheriff to suck.

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    Shark Attack Scotts FlatAdam Mills, 16, sustained non-life threatening injuries after he was attacked by, in his words, "a really big f'ing shark" while paddle boarding on the iconic Sierra Nevada foothills lake.

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    botox mishapWhat started out as a girl's night out Botox party ended badly when a first time General Practitioner failed to administer the doses correctly. Although no one was hurt, many of the participants do have some facial disfigurements that will probably last a few months, after which the toxin wears off.

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    Lawrence Welk KVMRKVMR announced late last week that they will be hosting the county's first 24 hour Lawrence Welk marathon. The move, which according to insiders was driven by elderly activism who wished to "also have a voice," is seen as a disingenuous attempt to combat and mute much of what area aging activists feel is a "anti-conservative/pro-liberal" agenda at the radio station.

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    DelOroDishFeaturedThe Del Oro theater in Grass Valley, CA and the popular movie streaming service NetFlix™ announced early Thursday that the theater's iconic tower on Mill Street will provide high-speed Internet to the downtown area. The service, which has been in the planning phases for almost five years and had numerous setbacks, will provide Internet speeds similar to that of Satellite broadband.

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    New Grass Valley Police OfficerThe Grass Valley Police Department release a memorandum late this week notifying the public that it has hired a former Ferguson, Missouri police officer. In the memo, the department wanted to make it clear that the new hire was in no way politically motivated, nor was there anything more "than a routine hire."

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    Nevada County "Intoxigrants"Nevada County, CA — Prohibition officers looking to serve an arrest warrant Wednesday ended up arresting seven people and seizing more than 1,100 tons of varietal grapes in what appeared to be a large processing operation. In what signals a new tactic for local law enforcement, most of those arrested were “intoxigrants” from out of […]

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    Beam over Nevada CitySeveral readers have contacted the Nevada County Scooper with reports of a mysterious beam of light emanating from the sky in Nevada City. According to more than one caller, the mysterious beam of light seemed to originate beyond sight in the upper atmosphere and "landed" on Coyote Street in North Nevada City. No injuries were reported.

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    An old fashioned English style gate with bright yellow and purple flowers announces a quaint pink cottage in the background.When the Foster family was relocating to Nevada City from Fremont, CA, they wanted to make sure that they purchased a house with character. Jim and Daphne Foster and their three children wanted a house with history. And according to local historian Dan Braggart, they "got just that: a whorehouse."

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    StonersThe nation's first restaurant dedicated to the burgeoning "impulse munchie" market is opening in the Sierra Nevada Foothills town of Grass Valley, CA. The new chain called Stoners™ which is new subsidiary of Chipotle Mexican Grill, Inc., is  and hopes to serve what the company believes is a radically under-served and growing market currently dominated by the fast food chain Taco Bell.

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    Mary Shilling vs. The Grass Valley RoundaboutAn area woman admitted on Thursday that she honks her horn as she travels around Grass Valley's Roundabout in her 1999 forest green Cherokee Sport to warn other drivers not to enter in front of her.

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    Privatize Nevada County HellNevada County Executive Officer Rick Haffey announcing that the County will issue a Request for Proposals (“RFP”) to replace the Board of Supervisors with a private entity, a move that he said is being implemented to decrease the costs of local government and improve efficiency at the Rood Center.

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    12226515_172490076432312_1912102189_nA rocket-propelled grenade was fired from the roof of the Del Oro Theater striking a late model Toyota late Sunday afternoon in Grass Valley, CA. The attack, which ISIS took responsibility for, was targeted the first white car to emerge from the Safeway parking lot on Neal Street.

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    Social ServicesGiven recent mandates to reduce the size of government from Republican leaders in Washington, without any guidance other than "figure it out," hundreds of County Heath and Human Services departments across the country have been forced to implement self-service features for their clients.

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    Dan Miller Staring Contest14 minutes and 26 seconds ticked off the clock as District 3 Nevada County Supervisor Dan “Stink-eye” Miller, smelling of sweat and determination, eyed the fearful constituent, but it paid off when the 63-year-old Rough and Ready woman finally burst into tears.

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