You Like? Please Share. Happy Holidays from the Nevada County Scooper. May your holiday be filled with good cheer and booze. Scooper Related PostsZuckerberg Concerned About the Number of Nevada County Facebook GroupsNevada County Scooper PromoScooper on the Street: Ebola PreparationAttempt To Donate Frozen Fish From 1984 To Food Bank Fails Area Woman Attempts To […]
Happy Holidays from the Nevada County Scooper, by Thos Nasty
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KNCO Swap Shopper Assures Audience that His Tires are “Like New”
You Like? Please Share.Grass Valley, CA — During a call to KNCO’s popular sales radio show on Monday, a man selling his set of four Goodyear Wrangler MT/R(r) assured the listening audience that his tires were virtually “like new.” “I know everyone on Swap Shop says their items are ‘like new,” noted Ken Weston, “but mine certainly are. […]
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The Nevada County Scooper Presents: Biker Food and Food and Toy Run 2014
You Like? Please Share. The Nevada County Scooper Presents Biker Toy & Food Run 2014 produced by Buck Butaan and Sarah Azura Belou. Every second Saturday in December – rain, snow or shine – hundreds of spectators line the route to watch motorcyclists (a record was set in 2009 with over 1,800!) rumble through the towns of […]
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R.L. Crabb Status Page
You Like? Please Share. R.L. Crabb, the Scooper’s patron saint and local cartoon legend is currently: Still Chooglin Updated Daily: GMT, that’s like England Scooper Related PostsR.L. Crabb Apparently Not DeadForty Niner Football Fracas at Local Cornish GatheringBrief: R.L. Crabb/Scooper in Dubious Battle for NCVoices Top SpotArea Woman Injured By Kmart […]
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Local Activists Propose Arming Deer Populations
You Like? Please Share.Nevada County, CA – Local animal rights advocates announced early Tuesday morning that they are proceeding with a program to “give the animals a fighting chance” by arming them with semi-automatic rifles. After a heated debate on a Nevada County Facebook group, animal activists have decided to re-introduce “balance” into the local […]
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Pet Cougar Makes Cedar Ridge Neighbors Nervous
You Like? Please Share.Cedar Ridge, CA – The residents of the usually quiet, worry free neighbor of Somerset Drive now have something to occupy their minds. Their neighbors, Peter and Jennifer Johnson, have just acquired a pet cougar. “We collect all kinds of pets and animals,” said a somewhat exuberant Pete Johnson outside his Somerset Drive […]
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Nevada City Considers Allowing Select Neighborhoods to go Fallow
You Like? Please Share.Nevada City, CA – In an effort to “get back to nature” and to attract the valuable Bay Area tourist dollars, the City Council of Nevada City is considering allowing select neighborhoods to go fallow. In the December 10th Agenda meeting minutes revealed that several council members are in favor of this […]
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Local Firewood Suppliers: We’re Out of Wood
You Like? Please Share.Nevada County, CA – Due to an overwhelming last minute and unexpected rush on firewood, Nevada County firewood suppliers have announced they have completely run out of dry firewood for this year. In the recent years, many county residents have chosen to wait to stock up their wood supply until after the […]
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Area Senior Can No Longer Print
You Like? Please Share.Grass Valley, CA – Reynaldo M. Rodriguez’s printer has stopped working. Mr. Rodriguez prints “every god-damned email” he gets because he’s afraid he’ll lose it. “I print every email because I’m not sure what happens to it after I read it,” an exasperated Mr. Rodriguez said in a phone interview with the Scooper. “My daughter […]
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Swap Shop Grandmother Gets No Takers for Free Color Television with Built-In VCR
You Like? Please Share.Alta Sierra, CA – Nancy Woods of Alta Sierra has found no takers for her free 19 inch color television with built-in VCR after advertising the item on the popular local call KNCO radio show Swap Shop. “It’s free, ” said Ms. Davies of Tammy Way in a Scooper phone Interview. “It’s in perfect working order, […]
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Martin Webb: Lovin’ His Peeps
You Like? Please Share.Never underestimate Martin Webb. A local raconteur, he loves his Nevada County Peeps. Earlier this morning he wrote a lovely holiday poem and posted it on Peeps. We asked him if it would be OK to share it on The Scooper. He agreed, so here it is: […]
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ASPCA to Nevada County: “No More Dogs For You”
You Like? Please Share.Nevada County, CA – Nevada County achieved its latest in a series of dubious “firsts” this week as the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (ASPCA) issued its first-ever outright ban on dog adoptions for an entire county. “This has been a long time coming,” sighed long-suffering NorCal ASPCA […]
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Local Chapter of PEPA Prepares for Protest
You Like? Please Share.Grass Valley, CA – Local members of the group PEPA—Petroleum Energy Preservation Association—are planning a protest this weekend in front of the Grass Valley Kmart on McKnight Way. ”PEPA’s goal is to promote the increased use of renewable resources, and the lessening of our dependence on petroleum products” explained Peter Portus, president […]
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Area Man Proclaims Autonomous State Inside Carl’s Jr.
You Like? Please Share.Grass Valley, CA – Nevada City resident Charles Jones announced his intention on Thursday to create Permanent Autonomous Zone called “La Burgia” in the back corner of the Grass Valley, CA Carl’s Jr. restaurant. “I proclaim this back booth at Carl’s Jr. to be La Burgia,” asserted Mr. Charles to a disinterested crowd […]
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“Victorian Christmas” To Be Renamed “A Charles Dickens Winter Solstice”
You Like? Please Share.Nevada City, CA – On Friday, the Nevada City Chamber of Commerce announced that beginning next year, the Victorian Christmas events in Nevada City will be renamed to “A Charles Dickens Winter Solstice”. Victorian Christmas is a decades-old tradition in Nevada City. It is well-known for its “magical setting of hilly streets outlined […]
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Sierra Buttes to Become Site of Huge Rock Sculpture of African-Americans
You Like? Please Share.Sierra City is about to get on the map, thanks to President Obama. Sierra City, CA — In what may prove a bonanza for local tourism and a boost for racial harmony, President Obama has just signed an executive memorandum calling for the creation of a Mount Rushmore-like creation on the Sierra […]
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North Korean Leader to Vacation in Nevada County
You Like? Please Share.Nevada County, CA – Democratic People’s Republic of Korea supreme leader Kim Jong-un announced through a spokesperson that he plans on vacationing in Nevada County this Summer followed by a trip to the Midwest to meet with basketball team the Chicago Bulls. The announcement is on the heels of the recent US […]
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Trader Joe’s to Nevada County: Please Shut Up
You Like? Please Share.Monrovia, CA/Nevada County, CA– In an unusual press release from the grocery giant, Trader Joe’s Director of Marketing James Washburn has told the citizens of Nevada County to “…shut the hell up, already. We heard you. We get it. You want a Trader Joe’s.” According to Wikipedia: “Trader Joe’s is an American privately held […]
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North San Juan Resident Can’t Handle the Hectic Pace of Grass Valley
You Like? Please Share.North San Juan, CA – Longtime “Ridge” resident Shep “The Ship” Walkins says he can’t handle the hectic Grass Valley rat race. Walkins has been living up on “The Ridge” for over 32 years and considers himself a local boy. “Look fella, I can’t handle that rat-race down in Grass Valley. The […]
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An Important Message From Scooper President Lou LaPlante
You Like? Please Share.Penn Valley, CA Dear Friends, We were contacted this afternoon by “Edwina Waters” with the NSA. She is a field representative with the SORC/FP (Special Operations Readiness Cell/Focal Point) operating out of Modesto, and currently responsible for cyber security in Northern California. Her office was informed that there was a possible cyber-attack […]
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