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Area Man Scolds “Muslim” Outdoor Umbrellas

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Lawrence Bergerson Shouting at "Muslim" UmbrellasLawrence Bergerson of Penn Valley took it upon himself to explain the evils of Islam to what he believed were burqa-clad women in a downtown Grass Valley restaurant. The lecture was believed to have lasted as long as 5 minutes before the management asked him to leave the property.

Middle Manager to Find Out Who’s Snoring on Conference Calls

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Pajas Balasubramanian has a plan to find out who is snoring on company calls.Area middle manager Pajas Balasubramanian has been tasked with the thankless job of finding out who keeps snoring on company conference calls. Mr. Balasubramanian, a naturalized American citizen from New Delhi, India, is currently the Managers of Education Experience for local firm Video Axcell.

Hackers Install Porn onto Automated Grocery Checkout

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Area grocery shoppers were shocked to find inappropriate videos on a local Safeway automated checkout.A local hacker group calling themselves the 420 Knights successfully installed adult videos onto area Safeway self-checkout machines. The group, which tool responsibility for the act yesterday via a Twitter feed, said that they were doing this this to "disrupt the robots" and to "give power back to the people." The tweet also contained a #FeelTheBern hashtag.

Area Man in Large Dodge Truck Feels No Need to Yield

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ctd-ram-rolls-on-prius-600Mr. Dickens, who drives a illegally modified Dodge RAM 3500 truck, narrowly missed crushing a Toyota Prius which was exiting the roundabout yesterday afternoon.

ISIS Training Ground Busted Up At Nevada County State Park

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ISIS seen in a cave with Ranch Dressing and various deer photographs.Local authorities and Federal law enforcement have broken up an elaborate ISIS terrorist operation in the Sierra Foothills state park Malakoff Diggins.

North San Juan Residents Panic as Sheriff Appears in “Cannabutter”

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Sheriff Royal butter no bluntLooking up at her was the smirking image of Nevada County Sheriff Chief Royal, his facial features and pointy mustache carved forcefully into the marijuana butter.

Area Man Attempts to Navigate Wife’s Purse

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Messypurse_featuredRecent Vacaville, CA transplant Tommy Empire attempted to search for his car keys in his wife's purse on Saturday with no success.

Wife Divorces Man After He Compares Her to Sarah Palin

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Divorce_PalinThings came to a head this week when Mr. Nicklas, in an attempt to compliment her, told his wife of 19 years that "she looked just like Sarah Palin" prompting Ms. Nicklas to file for a dissolution of marriage.

Local Activists Propose Arming Deer Populations

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Artist's rendition of Nevada County's armed deer population.Local animal rights advocates announced they are proceeding with a program to "give the animals a fighting chance" by arming them with semi-automatic rifles.

Nevada City Approves 2700ft 1.21 Gigawatt Communications “SkyTower”

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The 2700 ft. Nevada City SkyTower as seen from Broad Street.The Nevada City government overwhelmingly approved the construction of a 2722 ft (830m) communication building which is tentatively dubbed the Nevada City SkyTower.

Protests Break Out Over Proposed Blazing Saddles Showing

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Protesters, lead by Nevada City's Sairhra Ramun, held a demonstration out in front of Grass Valley's Del Oro Theater.Protests broke out late this week as a group of activists marched in front of Grass Valley's Del Oro Theater after the establishment announced plans to show a special matinee of Mel Brooks 1974 comedy film Blazing Saddles.

Seniors Debate Reporter’s Ethnicity For the Third Night

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Reynaldo M. Rodriguez and Stephen DonallyFor the third straight night, are seniors at debated the ethnicity of a KCRA TV News Reporter during the evening broadcast in their community center.

Area Parking Meter Reader Says Job Fulfilling and Rewarding

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Parking Meter Attendant Richard CraneumIf you live in or visit Nevada City chances are you will see Richard Craneum patrolling the streets of the downtown historical district. Craneum has been the city's sole parking meter reader for the last 8 years.

Area Man Brock Whalen Promises to Make Penn Valley Great Again

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Area Man Brock Whalen of Penn Valley wants to make the conservative township great again.Penn Valley resident and Donald Trump supporter Brock Whalen announced from his Lake Wildwood home office that he wants to make Penn Valley great again.

Gated Community Considers Controversial Comic Sans Font

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"Hip" Lake of the Pines entry sign in Comic Sans fontThe gated residential community Lake of the Pines (LOP) in Nevada County, California wanted to show surrounding towns and developments that it "knows how to party and lighten-up" this week by proposing a change in bylaws font from the conservative Arial typeface to the whimsical and highly controversial Comic Sans one.

Mysterious Light Beam Photographed Over Nevada City, CA

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Beam over Nevada CitySeveral readers have contacted the Nevada County Scooper with reports of a mysterious beam of light emanating from the sky in Nevada City. According to more than one caller, the mysterious beam of light seemed to originate beyond sight in the upper atmosphere and "landed" on Coyote Street in North Nevada City. No injuries were reported.

State of Jefferson Protest Prompts Mothman Appearance [VIDEO]

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Mothman Highway 49 Featured StormThe Mothman creature appeared after an 3 hour pro-State of Jefferson protest on the normally ordinary and uneventful overpass. The protest, which was organized to raise secession awareness for the proposed 51st State, seems to have drawn the foreboding creature to the Nevada County Area.

Chris Hemsworth’s Car Breaks Down in Grass Valley

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Chris Hemsworth's BMW broke down just south of Grass Valley on Friday. He was traveling with Friend David Spade to Tahoe City.Chris Hemsworth's BMW broke down just south of Grass Valley on Friday. He was traveling with Friend David Spade to Tahoe City.

County Historian: Quaint Victorian Actually a Whorehouse

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Victorian CottageWhen the Foster family was relocating to Nevada City from Fremont, CA, they wanted to make sure that they purchased a house with character. Jim and Daphne Foster and their three children wanted a house with history. And according to local historian Dan Braggart, they "got just that: a whorehouse."

‘Sheeple’ No Longer Acceptable as Insult

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sheepleYou don't hear much about animal husbandry in Nevada County  news these days. Sure, we have the 4H and NCAPSPCHAFFA, but the men and women running these farms – you just don't hear their voices very much. Far less is heard from their livestock.
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