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(showing articles 1 to 50 of 50)
(showing articles 1 to 50 of 50)

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    Nevada City, CA will become the first city in the nation to be "Chemtrail free."As the city council seats with new members this year, first on the agenda according to City Hall insiders will be a declaration that Nevada City is a Chemtrail-free zone. This will make the rustic gold rush town the first in the nation to enact such a law.

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    The ashes of Graham Chapman, the very dead English comedian, writer, actor, and one of the six members of the surreal comedy group Monty Python, are coming to Grass Valley's Center for the Arts the Scooper has learned.

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    Facebook CEO Mark ZuckerbergFacebook announced on Wednesday that it will put several Nevada County Facebook Groups on a "time out" until they can get their histrionic behavior under control.

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    Jessica Orson is worried about her daughter GMOsNevada City mother of two Jessica Orson recently admitted to the Scooper that she regretted naming her 16 year old daughter Gabriele Michelle Orson, or GMO for short.

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    Passive-Aggressive Roofing's first purchase: a contractor's bucket truck.After becoming frustrated with the overcrowded "Aggressive" roofing services market in Nevada County, newly formed Passive-Aggressive Roofing Company hopes to fill that void with a stubbornly hostile, snarky and a resistive attitude towards all customers.

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    Brent Underwood doesn't understand why someone won't eat the last Cheeto. However, if no one does, he will.Area technology worker and parental advice expert Brent Underwood doesn't understand why no one will eat the last Cheeto® in the break room. The lone puffy snack treat, which has sat in a paper tray for over 3 hours, has not been fondled nor eaten leading Mr. Underwood confused about what's wrong with it.

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    Nevada City, CA — Burt Bowles is fed up with fatphobia. Trying to live up to his New Year’s resolution to lose weight, Bowles, of Nevada City, decided to take a walk along the NID ditch on Banner Mountain, only to be turned back by a metal barrier with a pedestrian opening too narrow for […]

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    Brenda "Dusty" Woods of Nevada City, CA says her utility smart meter gives her vivid dreams.Brenda "Dusty" Woods of Nevada City, CA says that ever since PG&E installed an energy Smartmeter on the outside of her Cottage Street home, she's been experience vivid dreams.

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    Following the election of Donald Trump, the 92 year old Nevada County Scooper is concerned about its George Soros funding sources.The 92 year old Nevada County Scooper revealed today that it is concerned about the interruption of one of its primary revenue streams being interrupted after Donald Trump becomes the 45th President of the United States later this week.

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    Aspiring author Roy Riffle of Nevada City.Roy Riffle recently announced to a small crowd of Millennials at an area coffee shop that he intended to write the town's equivalent of James Joyce's Ulysses.

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    What started out as a playful refrigerator game with the intention of increasing the family's language acumen, has revealed deep angst and discontent inside a local Nevada City family.

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    Janet Williams of Cedar RidgeThe Scooper caught up with Ms. Williams at the egg stand on her weekly shopping trip for groceries. She was thoughtfully fondling the eggs.

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    Two North San Juan activists have won a landmark decision in the County Court allowing them to receive disability benefits for something called electromagnetic hypersensitivity or EHS. Merrilee Longshoes and Skyy Wolford of North San Juan, CA have been working for over two years to get their case through the court system.

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    Pajas Balasubramanian has a plan to find out who is snoring on company calls.Area middle manager Pajas Balasubramanian has been tasked with the thankless job of finding out who keeps snoring on company conference calls. Mr. Balasubramanian, a naturalized American citizen from New Delhi, India, is currently the Managers of Education Experience for local firm Video Axcell.

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    Dustin Jayce Dickens of Penn Valley and his unnecessarily large, rolled-coal Dodge RAM 3500.Mr. Dickens, who is a high school drop out and a Trump supporter, has recently stirred up trouble around Nevada County for what many call his arrogant and overcompensating attitude regarding his truck. There have been several eyewitness accounts that he disregarded basic traffic laws, often blowing-through stop signs, making illegal right turns from the far left-hand lanes, among other things.

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    Terry Adkinson of Grass Valley seen here attempting to get welfare benefits disguised as an illegal alien.Area trinket collector, “oriental” food connoisseur and occasional racist Terry Adkinson decided to make a point about illegal immigration last week by pretending to be an undocumented Mexican worker. Mr. Adkinson, who runs a local blog called The Conservarian: Reflections on American Exceptionalism, attempted to apply for assistance at the area Social Services office in Nevada City.

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    Aspiring author Roy Riffle of Nevada City.A burgeoning Nevada City author admitted today to a small group of his friends that he often inserts typos and other usage errors into online Facebook comments just to "fit in." Area writer and part-time poet Roy Riffle made the admission to his small author's group while they were enjoying street tacos at Nevada City's popular Mi Pueblo Taqueria on Union Street.

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    A new Nevada City ordinance is requiring the police to use aromatherapy for prisoners in local jails. The quaint gold rush town of Nevada City, CA will be the first in the nation to experiment with aromatherapy on hardened criminals.

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    A new Study by the Rundex Family Foundation suggests you are more likely to get injured from a falling can than a Muslim refugee.A 3 month emergency study by the Palo Alto-base Rundex Family Foundation has concluded that you are more like to be injured shopping in the Grass Valley Grocery Outlet Supermarket, than from a refugee from one of the 7 recently banned countries.

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    Nevada City, CA is in fact an old Star Trek set from the 1960s according to researchers.Historians from Brigham Young and Southern Methodist Universities have discovered that the quaint former gold rush town of Nevada City, California is actually a set from a lost Star Trek episode. The researchers made the discovery while digging through the Paramount television archives in Burbank, CA.

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    Janet Williams of Cedar RidgeCedar Ridge resident and professional shopper Janet Williams updated her Facebook status today telling her friends that she's actually looking forward to receiving 6 to 10 inches this week.

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    ISIS Terrorists seen here in their hidden cave located in a remote part of Nevada County.Local authorities and Federal law enforcement have broken up an elaborate ISIS terrorist operation in the Sierra Foothills state park Malakoff Diggins.

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    Alt-Right mascot Pepe the Frog was accidentally sautéed and eaten at a local restaurant.Pepe the Frog, beloved mascot of the alt-right movement, was inadvertently sautéed and consumed at Ike’s Quarter Café in Nevada City yesterday afternoon. Pepe, whose avatar is used by many commenters on 4chan, Reddit, and Breitbart News, was sitting in the outdoor terraced dining area when he was approached by the busser, Tyler “Earbud” Fulcrum.

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    It seems as local activists were away protesting the Dakota Access Pipeline, energy giants were busy in their own backyards drilling for oil.Nevada County activists who recently returned from Dakota Access Pipeline (DAPL) protests in South Dakota where shocked to find out that in their absence, multi-national conglomerate Energy Transfer Partners (ETP) had started oil exploration on Lake Spaulding.

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    An area conservative blogger is growing increasingly concerned about a possible plot by ISIS terrorists to attack his 1989 Buick LeSabre. Retired Colonel Jack Ripper as been spending the past two years planning for what he calls "a massive 'moooslem' attack on his Idaho Maryland Road home.

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    Nevada City, CA hopes to use several "crowdsourcing" platforms to generate operating income for the fiscally strapped city. Nevada City says that it plans to repeal and replace traditional revenue sources like taxes and fines, and use crowdsourcing systems to pay for the operations of the town.

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    Cedar Ridge Resident seen here in his boat the Tommy C docked in the Sacramento Delta.Frequent traveler, exotic animal collector and Cedar Ridge, CA resident Pete Johnson found himself in trouble over the weekend after he purchased a new fishing boat without telling his wife who unceremoniously kicked him out of the house. Mr. Johnson is currently living in his new boat which is docked 60 miles away in the Sacramento Delta.

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    Sal Smith of Alta SierraLocal retiree Sal Smith announced to his visiting family over the holidays that "a glass of red wine is good for your heart," as he consumed his 4th cocktail of the evening.

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    Long-time Nevada City resident, entrepreneur and coffee aficionado Sarah Benfer is opening the Nation's first "human processed" coffee roastery.Long-time Nevada City resident, entrepreneur and coffee aficionado Sarah Benfer is opening the Nation's first "human processed" coffee roaster featuring celebrities.

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    Napa, CA- Lake Berryessa has finally reached a point where it is overflowing into the Berryessa glory hole, a drain that opens to a spillway that bypasses the Monticello Dam. Local and state officials are growing concerned after watching the tragedy currently unfolding at the Lake Oroville dam, where erosion has created a possible spillway […]

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    Jim Woods of Alta SierraNew area transplant Jim Woods recently moved into a foreclosed "flipped" house in the decidedly middle class development of Alta Sierra located about 10 miles south of downtown Grass Valley. He also has the only privacy fence in the greater Alta Sierra area.

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    Gene Holman seen with his rope.Area resident Gene Holman announced late Friday afternoon that he plans on have a serious argument with a fire hydrant.

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    Nevada City's Michael Fair Davies claims he's the rightful King of England.A Nevada City, CA man has taken out a full-page advertisement in the New York Times claiming he is the rightful King of England and that he will ascend to the thrown after the death of the current sovereign Queen Elizabeth II.

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    The Obama Administration is bringing 10,000 Syrian refugees to Clearwater, Florida.Humanitarian workers will resettle the next wave of Syrian refugees in Clearwater, Florida, as a holdover executive order from the Obama Administration struggles to bring at least 10,000 Syrian refugees to the U.S. by the end of September 2017.

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    Zahhak Sobek, or better known by Grass Valley locals by give Earthly-given name of Gregg Koehler of Grass Valley, isn't interested in returning to his home planet.Zahhak Sobek, or better known by Grass Valley locals by give Earthly-given name of Gregg Koehler of Grass Valley, isn't interested in returning to his home planet.

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    Donald J. Trump grew up idolizing Hogg for all his achievements in the business world. After a recent campaign stop in Atlanta, Mr. Trump took a detour to visit his old friend in Hazzard County.

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    CIA operational agent Karen Bergman is regretting Samsung Smart Television spying assignment.Fairfax, VA —  CIA operational agent Karen Bergman is regretting her recent assignment to spy on owners of Samsung Smart Televisions. The 13 year veteran of the nation’s chief spy agency says she’s seen things that can’t be unseen across America’s family and bedrooms. “I took the job about 3 years ago as a part […]

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    The Nevada County Scooper presents: the Nevada County Crime Wave, Bizarro Edition March 2017. So crazy, that you will believe it.

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    James Dugan believes he is worth his $220,000 compensation package.Upon realizing that his $220,000 plus compensation package falls shy of enlisting him in the ranks of the famed "1%-ers," a Sacramento government director is disappointed that he did not meet the elite $350,000 threshold for his demographic.

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    North San Juan resident, part-time chemtrail researcher and amateur ionizing radiation hobbyist Skyy Wolford announced to a somewhat disinterested crowd out in front of the Sierra Super Stop that Ann Arbor, Michigan is an elaborate hoax and does not exist.

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    Walter Truman is primarily an egg farmer in Camptonville, but in an attempt to make a better layer he also breeds chickens.

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    This is what Broad Street would look like renamed to Nisenan Blvd.Area community activist and former Sacramento State University feminist Sairhra Ramun of Nevada City has petitioned the city council to formally change the name of Broad Street to Nisenan Blvd. The move, which has been expected by acquaintances close to the activist, was inspired by recent unrest at several college campuses across the country.

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    Naturopath "Doctor" Jerod Whitehorn Hoserben assumes he is going to be murdered at any moment. A local naturopathic doctor is perplexed as to why he has not been the target of the global 'Big Pharma' conspiracy to murder alternative health professionals.

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    AAA's Via Magazine has selected Nevada County's Wayne Brown Correctional Facility as a top vacation pick.In what began as a unintentional delivery of 3000 copies of Via Magazine to Wayne Brown Correctional Facility has turned into a big win for their public image.

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    Several readers have contacted the Nevada County Scooper with reports of a mysterious beam of light emanating from the sky in Nevada City. According to more than one caller, the mysterious beam of light seemed to originate beyond sight in the upper atmosphere and "landed" on Coyote Street in North Nevada City. No injuries were reported.

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    The Grass Valley Elk's Lodge held a contentious "support group" to discuss the menacing East Main Street Roundabout.The Grass Valley Elks Lodge has generously offered to host a support group for those adversely affected by the two roundabouts in our community. We met with the co-founders of the group who would like to be known as Todd and Pam to protect their identity.

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    Kent Waite of Grass Valley, CA isn't happy about what Animal Control told him.A Grass Valley resident is still grieving after discovering his beloved cat was caught under the wheel well of his Buick LeSabre and dragged for three city blocks.

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    James Richards seen before his recent death looking at his exclusive NASA photos of Earth taken from Space..Retired area "old-timer" James Richards has shared a special stash of photos he collected from "his NASA years" with family and friends. However since his recent passing, his son Richard suspects that his Father might have invented not only his astrophysics background, but also fabricated stories about his exclusive "space pictures" of Earth.

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    The global patchouli shortage has impacted Nevada County in a significant way.The news that worldwide production of patchouli oil would be at 27 percent of normal levels spread quickly throughout Nevada County last Sunday.

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    The residents of Sierra City, CA are readying themselves for helicoptersThe annual private meeting of North American and European elites known as the Bilderberg Group announced this week that they will be holding their annual conference at Herrington's Sierra Pines Resort in June of 2017.