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Nevada City Bans Indoor Plumbing
Nevada City, CA — After no public discussion, Nevada City has initiated a ban on indoor plumbing in the historic downtown district. The ordinance, referred to as The Real Mother Lode, includes bans on...
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Man Uses Dirty Sock to Dry Off After Shower
Ken Rice used a soiled sock found on his Cedar Ridge, CA bathroom floor to dry himself early Tuesday morning, according to sources close to the Rice family.
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Area Man Uses Tax Refund To Start Anti-Obama Blog
Retired Civil Engineer Jack Ripper announced Monday night that be plans on creating an "anyone but Obama" blog using the credits he received on his 2014 return.
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Nevada County Board of Supervisors Saves Chinese Economy
Nevada County’s general population has been reduced to wearing rags and cooking in barrels, utilizing books and home furnishings for fuel. Still others see this as a form of social justice for the sins...
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Father Teaches Son “Life Lesson” with Large, Unwieldy Plastic Bin
Area father Craig Thomas of Grass Valley decided to teach his 15 year old teenage son a "life lesson" by making him carry a large, unwieldy plastic bin filled with school supplies though a local...
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Quaint Victorian Really A Whorehouse, Says County Historian
When the Foster family was relocating to Nevada City from Fremont, CA, they wanted to make sure that they purchased a house with character. Jim and Daphne Foster and their three children wanted a house...
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Confirmed: 2.5 Mile Comet to Impact Local Man’s Brain
Playing off recent reports that a super-comet is scheduled to impact Earth in the same time frame, Mr. Wolford wanted to stress to the largely disinterested and sometimes nervous crowd that this...
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“Red Dog Jane” Ghost Spotted on Highway 20
The circumstances behind Janie H. Barnes' 1941 death are still a mystery. According to scant police records, Ms. Barnes was apparently walking alone towards Truckee during the early morning hours of...
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Lawn Watered
The grass is thirsty. Thirsty, thirsty grass. Drought? Sure, but grass is grass and it needs to drink or it dies. So, Chip Day knows exactly what to do. He waters his lawn. Existentialism at its finest.
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Traffic on Highway 49 Blocked by Bounce House
Local child entertainment specialist and owner of Big Giggles Bounce Houses Jerry Dodge, parked his Ford Econoline 350 van just south of Lime Kiln Road and inflated one of his Bounce Houses in the...
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Area Cloud Seeder Hoping for a Chemtrail Promotion
The former Navy Pilot and current cloud seeding captain of a Evergreen 747 based out of Beale Air Force base, has been eyeing the coveted Chemtrail Captain position ever since he joined Evergreen's...
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Disabled Tennis Player Arrested Again
Arthur Flausterman has been arrested and fined for another tennis-related crime. He was briefly taken into custody Tuesday and released on his own recognizance.
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Local Admissions and Outreach Director Drinks Kombucha, Still Feels Empty Inside
She, unfortunately, failed to feel the immediate effects of its probiotic properties, and loses faith in her ability to accurately discern colors at this point in time.
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Kangaroo Mob Runs Amok in North San Juan, CA
A mob of kangaroos has escaped from a private ranch on the San Juan Ridge, a remote hippie redneck community in the Sierra Nevada Foothills of Northern California.
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Catholic Church Creates New Circle of Hell for Grass Valley
Grass Valley, CA — In what one local Chamber of Commerce official is calling “a real blow,” Pope Francis, Bishop of Rome, and leader of the worldwide Catholic Church has delivered a sweeping encyclical...
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Wife Divorces Man After He Compares Her to Sarah Palin
Things came to a head this week when Mr. Nicklas, in an attempt to compliment her, told his wife of 19 years that "she looked just like Sarah Palin" prompting Ms. Nicklas to file for a dissolution of...
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Saudis to Purchase Del Oro Theater/Redesign Tower into Islamic Minaret
A group of influential and secretive Saudi investors announced this week that they plan on purchasing the Del Oro Theater located in Grass Valley, CA. As a part of the sale, the current iconic Del Oro...
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Man Worrying About Well Accidentally Runs It Dry
A Hidden Valley Road man accidentally ran is well dry after repeatedly testing the volume throughout the day on Sunday.
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Local Entrepreneur Thwarted by DSL
Grass Valley, CA — Nevada County Home Business “Shake It Well” came to a screeching halt on Sunday night when Bob and Danni Schlozmeyer’s DSL went down. “This happens a lot,” said a frustrated Danni...
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Police Pursue Driver With Oversized Korn Sticker
A 32-year-old, fifth generation Grass Valley man was arrested late earlier this week after a 6-mile, 55 mph with a coordinated and joint pursuit between the Nevada County Sheriff and the Grass Police...
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