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Nevada County Sheriff Investigates Tainted Santa Treats

You Like? Please Share.North San Juan, CA – Multiple reports of “at least 20″ Nevada County Sheriff’s Office patrol cars from the Rood Center heading up Highway 49 to the San Juan Ridge at around 4 am...

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Thomas Pynchon spotted in Lake of the Pines

You Like? Please Share.Lake of the Pines, CA – Recluse author Thomas Pynchon was spotted lounging on the shores of Lake of the Pines presumably at his lake-side home. It is unclear at this time why he...

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Lake of the Pines Woman Reuses Christmas Tree All Year

You Like? Please Share.Lake of the Pines, CA – Area Woman Margaret Porter reuses her artificial Christmas Tree  all year around to celebrate a myriad of festivals and holidays. “It all started a few...

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Persistent Volunteer Kills Town’s Can-Do Spirit

You Like? Please Share.Grass Valley, CA – A local woman’s chronic volunteerism is being blamed by townsfolk for robbing them of their initiative and dulling their once notable can-do spirit. Well-known...

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Foothill Country Dancers to hold “Germaphobe” Contra Dance

You Like? Please Share.Nevada City, CA – According to sources close to hopping Nevada County social dance scene, the popular Foothill County Dancers plan to broaden their reach by including a monthly...

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“The Sedona Vortex Store” to Open in Vacant Nevada City Building

You Like? Please Share.Sedona, AZ – In an effort to expand its “brand” outside the city limits, the popular New Age, Native American and Crystal purveyor The Sedona Vortex is considering opening a...

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Area Man Attempts to Navigate Wife’s Purse

You Like? Please Share.Cedar Ridge, CA – Recent Vacaville, CA transplant Tommy Empire attempted to search for his car keys in his wife’s purse on Saturday with no success. “I couldn’t find the damn...

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Scoopito: Jeff Pelline Announced As New Copy Editor for The Union

You Like? Please Share.Grass Valley, CA – After an exhaustive recruitment campaign that lasted literally most of last Thursday afternoon, The Union newspaper announced on Monday that Jeff Pelline, the...

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Penn Valley Residents Urging Carry and Conceal Plastic Bag Ordinance

You Like? Please Share.Penn Valley, CA – In an astonishing, and what some are calling a reactionary turn of events, citizens of the quiet, conservative census-designated town of Penn Valley are asking...

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Area Man Shamelessly Using Inappropriate Google Adwords in Web Articles

You Like? Please Share.Nevada City, CA – A local man has been adding high value Google Adwords into his articles to boost his Search Engine Optimization or SEO rating in attempts to boost his website...

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Easy Bake Oven Thwarted by LED Light Bulb Temperature

You Like? Please Share.Nevada City, CA — Warren Grant of Nevada City became agitated on Wednesday when his daughter’s Christmas Gift, a “retro” Kenner Easy Bake Oven, failed to cook the small-batch...

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Scooper Drone Over Nevada City

You Like? Please Share. Scooper Drone Over Nevada City, no birds or property hurt. No shots fired. 2013 Goblin 770 drone. Flight time 3 minutes, 30 seconds. Top Speed 160mph. Altitude 6000ft. GoPro...

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Local Fake Reporter Joins List of Mars-bound Earth Escapees

You Like? Please Share.Downieville, CA– The Nevada County Scooper has learned that Nuke Brunswick, an imposter who sometimes writes for a newspaper in another county, has added his name to those bound...

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Outrage: The Union Newspaper Publishing Fake News

You Like? Please Share. Grass Valley, CA – The Nevada County Scooper has learned that The Union newspaper, a publication that prides itself on 150 years of tradition and a 92-year-old battle with the...

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County Government Worker Disappointed He’s not a 1%-er Yet

You Like? Please Share.Nevada County, CA – Upon realizing that his $220,000 plus compensation package falls shy of enlisting him in the ranks of the famed “1%-ers,” a local Nevada County government...

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Area Hardware Store Employee Avoids Eye Contact

You Like? Please Share.Grass Valley, CA — Rick Guzman has been working in hardware for almost 9 years and has become an expert at avoiding customer eye contact. “That’s the trick, you see. You have to...

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Area Man Who Says “Wine Good for the Heart” on His 4th Cocktail

You Like? Please Share.Alta Sierra, CA – Local retiree Sal Smith announced to his visiting family over the holidays that “a glass of red wine is good for your heart,” as he consumed his 4th New Years...

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New Years Resolution Thwarted By Canal Gate

You Like? Please Share.Nevada City, CA – Burt Bowles is fed up with fatphobia. Trying to live up to his New Year’s resolution to lose weight, Bowles, of Nevada City, decided to take a walk along the...

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Vaccines Replaced By Witchcraft

You Like? Please Share.San Juan Ridge, CA – In what some are hailing as a breakthrough in the movement,  local anti-vaccine activists and Wicca practitioners have teamed up to prevent childhood...

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Local Parent to School: Whooping Cough and Measles “Good for the Herd”

You Like? Please Share.Nevada City, CA – Lisa Fellows has two children at Yuba River Charter School. William, aged 10, and Betsy, aged 13. She home-schooled both of them until they were 8, and then she...

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